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I had a miscarriage in October.

I had a miscarriage in October. We are blessed to have two little boys and had chatted about having number three our youngest was just a year so decided to wait a little. My period was late and I did a test it wasn't definite so I got another the worded one. Straight away it came up positive. My husband was at work I was getting ready to return to work after maternity leave so it was a whirlwind of emotions. I was delighted but scared how we would cope with 3 under 4 the timing, the fact I hadn't taken any prenatal vitamins. When I told my husband I burst out crying he was delighted. He said we'd figure all out. The next day I started lightly bleeding I had similar with my first so didn't worry too much. Then it got heavier got a doctor's appointment and was sent straight to hospital. They did a test the HCG level was raised slightly that showed a pregnancy but too low to maintain. It was horrible but I kind of said it wasn't meant to be. I had to go up 7 days later for another blood test just a formality. The nurse rang a hour later I was in the car on the way to buy a bigger car seat for my little man. I will never forget. She said HCG levels had raised a lot so it looked like it could be a healthy pregnancy after all. I was shocked didn't take in what she said only that they wanted to track my bloods every 48 hrs for the next week. Each day I'd wait patiently on the phone call each time it was good news. I had another week to wait until the scan I was getting morning sickness and feeling dizzy migraines etc similar to both times with my boys and all bleeding had stopped. Then I had the scan I knew when the lady was doing it that it wasn't right she asked me to go to the restroom and she would do an internal when I came back. I knew by the look on my husbands face she had said something to him. She did the internal it was so sore on one side she said the doctor would chat to us. I just said please can you tell us what you see so she said their is a sac but no embryo or else it's off an unknown location. She said the fact I wasn't 100percent sure of my dates that maybe we needed more time. When we met the doctor she said the same and to keep getting bloods every 48hrs and come back in 7;days again bloods were tracking the way they should until 2 days before the scan they rose but only a little. Had the scan and she said it was an unembryonic pregnancy. Was given the medication. Nearly 4 months on it's really hitting me. I feel guilty for being sad as we are blessed to have our two little men and it wasn't exactly planned and the fact I cried when I told my husband and not jumped for joy like when I found out with the boys. My 2 best friends are pregnant and due similar time to me I feel awkward around them and guilty for feeling that way. Any advice would be really appreciated and also what we can do to remember our due date May 28th. Sorry for the very long post and thanks for setting up your web page.

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